Thursday, July 15, 2010

Random Thoughts

I have been making the last minute preparations for baby #3 to arrive and it has really got me to thinking...like alot.

OK, I think I have all the "stuff" I need, and ironically enough, the third go round you actually know what stuff you need and what stuff is just marketed to first time Moms to get in their wallets. Necessities? Newborn diapers, size 1 diapers, wipes, desitin, mylicon, gowns, pacifier, blankies, somewhere for baby to sleep (crib in my room), extra bottles in case nursing doesn't go as planned...check

Emotional stuff....hmmm...am I ready? I remember feeling the same way when I was expecting Lilly. I would hold Noah and play with him or watch a video or read a book, and when it was very very quiet the thought would hit me that it was very bittersweet. I would think...hmmm...it will not be like this again. No longer will it be just the two of us, and me be able to focus solely on the little boy who had become my best friend and constant companion for the last three and a half years of my life. I wondered if I was ready for that and more importantly I wondered if he was ready for that.

But little Lilly came right along and immediately my heart seemed like it doubled in size. Was there enough of me to go around, of course. There was more love for both of them every time I watched them together and thanked God for the blessing of my two healthy children. Sure there was less sleep, more laundry, and more times for me to be spread very thin but it has been a small price to pay for the joy that Lilly has brought to our family. Honestly it seems like since she's been with us always, the same way with Noah.

So occasionally I am going around the house and tending to one of the kids and I have that bittersweet thought of how it will never be just the three of us again. God willing, again, our family will grow, as my heart will, and our family will once more welcome a little person who will seem like she belonged with us from the start...and I am amazed and overwhelmed at how I ever got so blessed.

8 comments:

Lesley said...

Well you've started off my morning in tears...and yes, you've nailed it all. Your heart will grow and of course there will be plenty of you to go around. Another bonus is not only your heart and Travis' will grow - so will Noah and Lily's. They will have another person in life that they will love beyond measure.

I'm getting so excited about Annie's arrival. I can't wait to come over and just sit and hold her! (I'm already thinking supper ideas so I'll have a good excuse to come right away!)

Missed you last night - hope no one is sick. Let me know how your appt. goes today! I'll be waiting to hear!

jparsley said...

No one is sick, thankfully, but Travis had to work until 7 and my feet and legs were pretty swollen so I stayed home with the kids and rested a while while they played!
You can come as soon as you want, supper or not!!!

Stephanie said...

I can't belive it's almost time to meet Annie! It is amazing how the list of "must have" baby supplies decreases with each baby:)

Beth S said...

Jess,

Stop making me cry! I'm at work for Pete's sake =) Can't wait to hold, kiss, and spoil Annie. Love you!

Erica Simpson said...

Me too! Maybe we will still be there together next Friday!

Brittany said...

I felt the same way before Luke, I just couldnt imagine how I could love another human being as much as I loved him ---- and (as you know) it is instant and beautiful!!!

So happy for you!! Can't wait for her to arrive!! :)

The Doyle Family said...

Aww...Jess! I am excited for you and your whole family. You are such a great mom. Annie is going to be so blessed to have four people that love her more than anything within her immediate family!

Carol said...

Just reading this...and crying! I think all of these thoughts are perfectly normal, but we all know that very soon we'll all wonder what we ever did without Annie! I absolutely can't wait to hold and snuggle her! I just hope Lesley and I get to pull a giggly all nighter, complete with doughnuts like you all go to do for me, but I somehow doubt that we end up at the hospital before you even know for sure you're staying! :)